I feel so bored!!! Tyler is going to spend a few extra days with his Dad. I finally am getting some rest from my job. I was suppose to be working right now, but the man who I was going to take care of has died during the night. I am not sure I really want to be working with hospice patients anyways. Well lets look for some pictures to show off.

I am still adjusting to my new hours at my job. I am working less, but still really long days. I am still not sure if I will lose my clients to the nursing home or not. I really don't think it will be the best move for them, but then again I am biased. I say this, because they are used to having one person to take care of the two of them. If they move, they will have to share a caregiver with many other old people. I can see Sandy* becoming really mean FAST! All I can say is do what you think is best.
I have to start considering working for other clients. So, on Friday, I am taking on a new client. That's if he lives that long. He is on hospice. I have a fear of people dieing on my watch. So hospic isn't something that I really want to do. However, it's something I can do for others.
I am starting to get used to not having the internet at home. I still don't quite like it though. I did get some housework done so maybe it's a good thing.

Sometimes, I feel as if I am doomed. Like bad stuff just keeps happening to me. My clients are driving me crazy. It's not all bad. Mostly, it's the heavy emotional stuff that I don't want to think about. I hear things from this married couple that most don't get to hear. I don't try to eavesdrop, but I have normal hearing.
The other night, the retirement home bus hit my van. Bob thought it was funny, because he crashed into the same lady's car a few years ago. Even though, I feel like bad stuff follows me around, my mood is improving. I am laughing again.
Tyler and I was able to visit with Pam. She is just awesome. I really love her. She is the person I call if I am sad. She can always lift me up. She gave Tyler a math lesson and some ideas to help him at home. Tyler had a good time too, because he was able to swim in her pool. I need to post some pictures of my broke tree and van and everyone can laugh at it too.

We have been getting counseling from a church. Having not come from a family that spoke of God, it's been a little odd to hear someone speak so much of it. The other day, I was really wondering if what he has to say is real and to give me a sign. Well, guess what? The wind picked up, and I was wondering if that was my sign. Today, I looked in the back yard and our apple tree is down. So maybe there is a God and he is pissed!!!! :)

I am so mad at myself. A very nice lady gave me a digital camera so I could keep working on my scrap book and I lost it. Or someone walked with it. Maybe it was a kid, I just don't know. Damn!This really sucks on top of everything else going on.

My heart is just breaking into two right now. My clients are most likely moving into the nursing home, because they need a level of care that don't involve the caregivers sleeping at night. It will almost double what they pay. So at the age of 98 years old, they have to face one more move before they go on to heaven. It's so sad. I cried myself to sleep and had a good cry in the morning. I kind of understand what my company is doing, but I feel like they are going to kill them. Sandy* is the problem isn't catching on to anything yet. I suppose that's the best. But poor Bob is so depressed. Sunday, is my last live-in day. I will probably get at least two more weeks with them. I will be working from 9 am to 11 pm at night. That should be a breeze. Just saying goodbye isn't going to be easy. Maybe it's not a goodbye, but I will see ya later.

My clients are becoming too much to handle. It's Sandy who is causing all the trouble. She doesn't think right anymore and basically is keeping everyone awake at night. My company is going to force them from going to a live-in arrangement to a 24 hour round the clock care. This means that there will probably be more caregivers and hourly pay and no more sleeping at work. I am not sure if this is good or not. I feel as if Bob had taken our advice and gave her something to help her sleep this could be avoidable. It's going to probably double his costs for their care. It's not going to as of right now, but it could be a possible they kicked us all in the ass if they move into the nursing home. I am kind of scared, but thrilled at the chance of living a normal life again. It's what i have been wanting to stay with my clients, but less time.

Men are pigs!!!! Oink Oink.

Who is the birthday girl?

My Mom is!!! Tomorrow is her birthday!!! I would do a silly birthday video, but our internet friends moved and no more free internet at home. It really sucks! I am not going to tell he age, but she is 20 years older than me. Happy Birthday Mom!!!

Lately, when I go for walks, I see a lot of homes empty and for Sale and even garage sales in the house. So Sad!! Home owners keep the fight going!!! Owning homes and having a big goofy dog has to be the American dream.

Tell my Mom Happy Birthday!!

Two months from today marks, my daughter's 18th birthday!! I hope she didn't grow up as fast as me. I hope she continues to go to school and become the best of what she can become. I can only imagine that she is beautiful!!! I hope she handles hearing about all the grief from the 9/11 attacks okay. I really don't handle it well. It pisses me off! Oh well. What can I do.