I have to work. On top of that. I have 28 hours for the week. I know it's a good thing. It really is good, because I do have too much time on my hands, but it's summer and I was having a really good time. I worked 9 hours last week and suppose to be 28 this week. We will see. It could always change, because ya know old people come and go. I don't know what the next few weeks will play out for hours. I wouldn't surprised if it went back down to zero. But who knows. All I know is that I get tired of meeting new old people. It's so close to starting a new job. New old people with different problems and different ways of dealing with them. Well, at least it's a old lady. I prefer them.
I am down 26 lbs now. I think not working actually helps me because taking care of some old people is a lot of sitting on my butt. And you wonder why I complain. lol How about the tv is too loud? Or old people pee themselves. No. Just kidding. Old people are really sweet. I just really miss my clients that I had for over two years. They took part of me with them. I miss them so badly.

When I was growing up, I would never be around my parents and caught saying ass, shit or fuck. Also, we didn't ask to say these words. It was just known that their was a time and a place and when Mom and Dad were around wasn't the time. Also, we didn't sit there and put in videos with fuck this and fuck that and you know what I mean. I know I grew up in a different time. No you tube and stuff.
My kids are so much more likely to say words that would have made me blush for days. lol and I suppose it's a good thing. You can't tell me didn't know how to talk to me.
Tonight, Will was showing me videos on the computer and you tube. I have zero patience letting things load. I can only take about a min of fuck this and fuck that around my kids. Am I wrong? I got mad and told him if he is going to sit there and listen to that crap to leave the room. A few minutes later I said that I was sorry but that I am not his friend. You can sit there and do that crap with your friends but I am your Mom. I personally think that him sitting around listening to that in front of me is close to the same as using that kind of language.

work

I got a call from work. I have to work 5 30 pm to 10 30 pm today and tomorrow. Then, next week, I have 28 hours with the same person. I know this should be good news, but I haven't worked in three weeks and then I am suppose to play the happy caregiver. lol The lady is 100 and as far as I know it's just her. That is good because husband's and wives degrade each other. It's hard to explain. But if one is the weaker one and needs help then the healthy one wants everything done for them. They want them treated like a baby.
I am happy that I am going to earn money but I feel like every time I go to a new client it's like learning a new job. All the stress for a few bucks. I don't wanna put on the comfort keeper tshirt. Ewww Did you know that I hate tshirts? I hate having material that close to my neck.

News

I have been sitting on some exciting news. I didn't share this earlier for my own reasons but now I think is a really good time to announce that life has been treating me good.
I am sure everyone is aware that I had a child young and wasn't able to raise her because of lack of support from my parents. Well, anyways that baby girl grew into a beautiful young lady. She is the cutest girl ever. I have been in contact via Internet since Oct 19Th. It's been great getting to know her and see that she is an happy well adjusted kid.
I feel really confident that someday when she is ready we will meet. I want to meet her NOW. But I know she needs more time and I can live with that. I can give that too her. I still cringe when people ask me how many kids that I have. Do I say two? Or three? Or hell. do I say five? lol A few times I have said between my husband and I we have five kids, but it doesn't feel right. So, mostly I just say two. Because I really don't want to get into my whole life story lol
Well.. anyways... now you know my big secret. I am beginning to feel whole again. I would show you a picture of my girl but out of respect for her. I won't share that with blog land. However, trust me. She is beautiful and I love her.

Today, I got my first full unemployment check. It's almost dollar per dollar of what I brought home working three days a week. If anything it's more.
Also, last week, I had a ten hour overnight shift and I got paid for that. It's the first paycheck that I have gotten from my job in a month.. It was for about 80.00. I feel like being a smart ass and jumping up and down and say... yea!!!! We can eat now. haha
Well, gonna go load the dishwasher. Someone has to do it.

Today, Tyler and I went to the Y. I walked a little and then we went swimming. Normally, I use the special needs locker room, because I hadn't yet had confidence in that he could go in the boys locker room all own his own. It hasn't been fun trying to take turns showing with a boy. So, when Will has been along, I have had him make him do more and more on his own. So, today, was the first day that I sent him on his own.
We had fun swimming and even went into the lap pool. I didn't think I could leave him alone, but since he is 7 and up and can swim. I am able to let him swim on his own. Then, I lied out in the sun for a few minutes. It wasn't too hot then though. I really enjoy being able to go swimming as much as we like. I really been taking full advantage of the pool since it reopened. I guess the closing, in a way, was a good thing. I still really miss the hot tub though. I wished I was able to find another gym with one, but the Y has so much for Tyler and it took a year to get him ready for hanging out on his own. It's not that I don't want to hang with him, but it's nice that at times I can get sometime on my own.
Tonight, we were suppose to go babysit for Meld, but the church was all locked up. All the Mom's and babies and Meld workers showed but we couldn't get in. I didn't feel like going right in so we went back to the Y. We walked around outside for a few and then went inside and goofed around on the wii. I am really enjoying the wii and we even bought another game. The video store is going out of business and has games on sale. I think I am so new to the wii that the cheap games for dorks are fun for me. So, far, I haven't paid more than ten dollars for a game.
Well, enough for now. I hope everyone had a great day. I didn't do much. I went to my friends Rachel's for a cookout. I "cried" most of the time, because my contacts made my eyes burn. She took me home to get my glasses and then I was fine. The three margritas didn't hurt any. hmmmmm good. Then, I spent the night with my boring husband. The kids were with their Dad so no real reason to see the fireworks.

Today, I didn't do some flea bombs in our house and left the cat in here. I didn't do it. She did it. She must have came back in. So, after spending over a hundred is the past week on frontline and bombs, I didn't kill the cat. She appears fine. I forgot to see if she has any fleas on her.

Today, was the three year mark of when we bought our house. It's an awesome feeling to own a piece of property that belongs to us. I would suggest home ownership to anyone who wants the stability of not moving around but don't let anyone tell you that it's cheaper than renting, because it is not.
Tonight was week two of ten weeks with Meld. I love babysitting the kids and I do it for free. The satisfaction that I get from helping the Mom's use this program was enough for me. This week, there was six kids. All but one was under two. The youngest was a boy who was only seven months old. So, there was three boys and three girls.. the brady bunch came to mind. lol I brought Tyler with me and he was really helpful. He actually held the biter girl for about ten minutes or so and read to her. I have never worked for a daycare and I have to give the workers so much credit. Taking care of one kid or two is so easy. However, taking care of six kids even with an helper is a lot of work. The brady bunch!!!

Tonight, I was feeling cooped up. I am not working and it gets to me. I want to get up and go. Tad suggested that I go swimming. So, I did. The best part of having a membership at the Ymca is that I pay it once a month and if I don't have money to do something it's always an option.

It's not odd for me to spend about two hours there. For six weeks the pool was closed and it really bugged me. I have discovered the lap pool. I really like the idea that I can really focus on swimming and not so afraid of drowning because at it's deepest it's only 5'9. I am hoping that it will help get my arms more in shape. Have you ever heard the expression... that you don't know what you have till it's gone? I think that's how it was with the pool. I used it once in a great while. I took it for granted. I have been in it more times this month than I probably have been in the whole six months of 2010. Not working kind of helps though. My work did call me and give me an 10 hour overnight on July 1St. So, oh boy, I can eat this week. hahaha.

Well, guys, it's late. Tomorrow, will be another day for the Ymca. Me and the water are having an affair.

Last night, I started volunteering for Meld again. There was a three week break and I admit that it was nice. There is a new volunteer working with me and so far, I think she is a little weird. She told a sob story about being pregnant at 30 and understanding where these girls are coming from. I don't think someone pregnant at 30 compares to the 14 to 21 crowd. I want to tell her to shut up. I had my three kids before I was 30 and while it's not her fault but still shut up. Then, she keeps talking about starting over. I said, what do you mean, starting over, your child is grown? She is talking about a grandson. Unless, you are raising your grandchild then you are not starting over. A new adventure, maybe? Hello.... the person is starting a new life is the parents of the baby.. There is no start overs. I will never be Ashley's Mom. Her friend, maybe.. but her Mom. No. So, shut up, lady.
I am all for grandparents wanting to visit and see their grandchildren, but they are your grandchildren. They are not your child. I know some grandparents who want to be overly involved. I am not talking about visiting here and there, but the ones who really try to step in and give way too much advice and allow their children to always drop their children off so they can do what they do. I know my ex mother n law did this with her daughter. She allowed her daughter to walk out on her children, because her children were her life and when they were grown they needed an replacement. So, lady, your not starting over. Quit, trying to compare yourself to young girls who are Mom's young.
Then, she acts like she didn't know what to do because the baby made a baby noise. What do I do? Um... play with him. That is a happy noise. Mom's know their kids best but I do know a happy noise when I hear one. Then, she asked about gloves.. she is afraid of getting hiv from the babies. Weird. I never thought that a little baby would infect me. Should I be worried. What a nut. It should be an interesting ten weeks.