Yesterday, Tad and I celebrated our third wedding anniversary. It's hard to believe it's been three years already. I can't help but me amazed at Tad's and mine struggles in this marriage. It was rough going for a while. I didn't fully understand the depth of his drinking problem and he didn't fully understand the depth of my loss over my daughter being placed for adoption. I just didn't move on. I was sad. I was sad a lot. He was drinking a lot. It wasn't a good combination.

He has been sober for a year and half and I am so proud of him. He doesn't make any promises but says he has zero desire to drink. If he knew the cure, he would probably sell it to you. I have been in contact with Ashley for a year now. It's wonderful. I have pictures of her in my house. I went through a lot of counseling to be able to cope better. The contact in the middle of that really helped a lot. It's so amazing to see how great of a girl she is. Also, a very beautiful and smart girl.

So, our anniversary means a lot to me. It's not just a number or a date. It's the time that I married my husband. I am so glad that I did and I am glad that we have found happiness with each other again. It's a bad feeling when your home life is really depressing. I have never felt so loved that I do with Tad. He has always been good with Tyler. He has been really trying to get along with Will and we all know that getting along with a teenager takes patience. He tells me that I am beautiful and is always there for me.

He accepts how I am silly and like to collect dolls and dress them. I have a total of six now. Three girls and three boys. The brady bunch. lol Saturday, we were by ourselves and out and about and we stopped so I could pay on my doll. After, I gave a twenty, he asked how much was left and paid the balance. Then, he was making fun of me of how I quickly had to lock the door of the van. The doll thieves are out there, ya know?

It was also Jen and Gary's birthday and I hope they had a great day. Today, is my brothers birthday. I should call him later. I should be sleeping but can't. Tad thinks it's all in my head. I just want to sleep so bad and I can't. So, basically, every week, I loss out on a nights worth of sleep. I don't need a lot of physical energy on Sunday night because my client is sleeping but I have to stay awake. I watched two movies and was really uncomfortable because the house was hot and stuffy. Well, anyways, I have went on and on and that's enough for now.