I am pretty content with life right now. I am happy with my relationship. It's not perfect but then who's relationship really is. We been working together trying to get my house and yard in shape. It's coming along but needs more work. Today, we hired someone to do our yard work. They really did a good job.

Tomorrow, I am going to practice shooting darts for a league that starts on Tuesday. I am pretty excited about it.  It's been about ten years since I gave it up. I will be in one league where I use regular hand darts and come June in another league where I use a blow gun. I am most excited about the blow gun league. 

I am looking forward to getting out and having a good time. We actually will be shooting a double the first night so lots of games. Hopefully, I will get the hang of the new machines. It blows my mind how one can actually shoot darts against someone far away.  I don't think that would be as fun though.

I have a couple exciting runs coming up. On July 4th, I will be meeting up with a friend to do a 8 mile trail run. I done it once before. I know my friend will leave me cause she runs faster. I am okay with that. Especially since I know what to expect this time.

On August 20th, I will run a half Marathon in Chicago with another friend. I know her from the YMCA.  She ran the last few miles with me when I did the half last summer. We will drive there the night before and get a room.. run the half Marthon and then shower and come home.  This is pretty cool. I want to see the world. I have never been to Chicago before. I am really looking forward to it. This friend won't leave me. We will stay together.

I haven't done much running lately though. I don't run in the winter. I just do my fitness classes. I am excited to get started. I think I will do that on Sunday.. Just get it done in the morning before I get too busy.   The weather hasn't been really nice yet but it's getting there.

I plan on sticking with the body pump classes but will exchange a couple other days for running. My friend and I want to beat our last years time. She thinks I came in a little faster than her. My time was 3 hours and 5 minutes.. so hopefully I can beat it.. Mostly, I am just excited to do the run and take in different view.











 

new adventures

I was asked to join a dart league besides the league I already signed up for. I don't know why I struggled so badly with the decision to do it or not. I used to shoot darts with my first husband and enjoyed it. I got out of darts shortly after our divorce.  Darts was more his thing but I do miss the competition.

I had a hard time deciding to commit to the hand darts because it would mean for a few weeks I would be playing twice weekly.  I get to thinking about the money.  If I feel like I have to struggle to have the dart money then I know darts won't be fun for me.  I am really excited about blow gun. I wasn't feeling the excitement of hand darts.. I did feel a little pressure to join but the longer the day went on the more I kept thinking about playing.

Time is a big issue for me. I work full time. I strive to workout 4 to 5 times a week. Sometimes, that is fitting in 45 minutes of a class before work. I do majority of the cooking because home cooked meals is important to me. I don't want to get lazy and not have time to cook.

Lastly but not least at all.. my concern is my youngest son. Now that I work full time and I don't always have someone home with him he spends some evenings on his own. He has been doing a pretty good job but I feel bad. I don't like him having to eat alone or eating frozen dinners. Some nights more than not.. I have leftovers that he can heat up.  So if I play darts twice a week that is twice a week I am either away from him or bringing him with me.  Then, it's not really the same as a "night out" If I have to wear my "mom" hat.   I already have a lot of guilt over not always being there or having the free time or cash to do things with him.

I feel guilty about the money. I don't know why but when I spend money these days I feel bad about it. No one has ever made me feel this way. Most of the stuff I am feeling bad about isn't stuff I really need but want. Nothing really majorly expensive. I just recently bought a hand dryer for painting my finger nails.

My biggest reason for committing to this league is because I really need to get out there and be around other people. I have my couple friends but I don't know why but mostly when woman get together we go eat. It's not totally a bad thing because people got to eat.  I just am looking forward to being around other adults competing.

A handful of these people is part of the old crowd from when I was shooting darts before. I think there is a part of me that is nervous stepping back into the game. I imagine some nights I will have to go by myself and fear not fitting in. I have never been one to have many friends. I don't want to sit there feeling like I am not part of the crowd. 

new/old hobby

I am pretty excited!! Soon I will be getting into darts again! It's been a very long time. I am going to participate in a blow and throw league. I will be doing the blowing.

A very long time ago, I went to state and took 3rd place one night and the second night my partner and I took first place.  I don't know if I will ever compete on that kind of level though again. 

I am not much into doing a lot of traveling and events like that on my own.  I like to have people with me who will take care of me.. I get lost easily. I could even get lost in a hotel.

I am just going to take it one day at a time.. Right now it's just a league.  I don't even know who my partner is.. they set it up for me.

I was supposed to get my blow gun tonight.. My guy drove me and everything and it wasn't in yet.. Pretty bummed out.. Nothing has really gone right this weekend. I was suppose to see my grand baby but no baby... suppose to get my gun.. but no gun..

I did get lots of cuddles from my guy! He is pretty awesome.

I almost forgot about this blog. I haven't wrote on here in a very long time.  I haven't done much writing at all these days. I am trying to get back into it. 
I am about to take a road trip to one of my retreats on my own. It's pretty exciting and scaring at the same time.  Will post more about that later maybe.