Today we went to the hotel for some swimming and the hot tub. Normally the hot tub is nothing more than a hot bath, but today it was hot. However the Ymca hot is still better. We all had a good time. Then we had dinner at Bk. I know not the best food.
Then we went to the pet store. I had plans to show Tad fish tanks. I want a big tank. I am shooting for a 55 gallon set up that is somewhat affordable, but a lot of money to spend. I have the money, but couldn't justify it quite yet. My puppy dog eyes didn't work for a fish tank, but it did work for a bunny. It looks like we are adopting a bunny that is there from the animal shelter. We applied for her and she is only seven dollars. I still want the fish tank.

I want a big fish tank!!! Someone years ago stole my fish tank. I want it back. Someone go buy me about 40 to 60 gallon tank. Don't you all love me??? :)

Tad and I were listening to music on the computer and he played Summer of 69. He said that was the best days of his life. That was when man landed on the moon. Which reminded me what the best days of my life was. It made me a little sad, because you can't go back. There isn't a reset button to start again.
Well anyways the best days of my life, when I say the best I mean life was without worries. It was my time with my sister before the house was taken from under us. Tammy and I spent a lot of time playing outside. We didn't play video games. We played with mud, made weed soup, stole veggies from the neighbors, I won't say what else we did. haha. We had a old fridge so store our mud pies. We had rose bushes in our yard. Life was sweet. Did my sister beat me up sometime. Oh yea but no one else was allowed to do it. Then they lost the house, the divorce and life went to hell in a hand basket. I never knew if we would stay in the same apartment for any length of time. The time where we didn't have to worry was gone. Only thing is we didn't know what we had till it was gone. I guess that's how life works. Well enjoy some music and my drawing of my house. It was tore down to build a Walgreens.

There hasn't been too much going on in my end of the world. School isn't going as well. First off this teacher isn't cute. haha. Most importantly he so far hasn't made a good impression on me. Words come out of his mouth, but I don't get anything he says. Sometimes he just talks about crap and other times he is explaining what he wants, and even asking a question I feel like huh what did you say? I am thinking he needs a pill to slow his talking down. lol
I cooked in the crock pot today. I love easy cooking. It was pretty good. Tad taught Tyler how to use chop sticks, and that's cool I guess, but hello we are white!!
My clients are doing good for their age. Last summer I thought one of them would die before the fall and I was wrong. Sandy* will be 98 next week, and we are going out to the club for dinner. Neither one of them has fallen down in a while and they haven't been peeing the bed. On the other hand, they are sleeping more and more. Lately they are in bed before 10 at night. It used to be they would be pushing midnight. I used to feel like come on.. I didn't get to sleep till noon. I give both of them a hug and kiss goodnight and every night Bob* tells me to take care of himself. I feel like that his way of accepting that he might wake up dead.
Tomorrow Tyler is singing in a musical program at his school. I didn't notice till today and I work tomorrow. To my job's credit without much notice, they found someone to work the four hours for me. So if anyone knows Tyler will be performing at his school at 6:30 pm tomorrow night.
My little sister came over and I got to look through the old family photos and she is making me copies of some pictures. Thank you Mom for trusting Michelle with a lifetime of pictures.

Today I went to see a old math teacher, She is great. I have the deepest level of respect for her. She taught me math back when I was in the 10th through the 12th grade. There was something about her that made me look up to her then, and something about her that makes me look up to her now. I spent four hours talking with her at her house. If I am feeling down and I talk to her, she lifts my spirit. Sometimes it's what she says or just her voice that lifts me up. She told me that she loves me, and I love her too. It's not the first time she said she loved me. She cried when I was graduating from school. She didn't want to let me go, but had to let me go. I love her!!

We are done babysitting

We were babysitting my sister's dog Princess. She is a lab mix. Did you know that the labs are the number one wanted dog in the world. Princess needs a home, but ours isn't it. There was a part of me that would have liked to try and make it work, but with one big, hyper, smart lab, a dog missing a eye, because he isn't so smart, and 4 cats and a bunny it just wouldn't work out. Here is a picture of both big dogs with Tyler. Anyone know anyone who would like a little lab? The dog without the tongue hanging out is the one who needs a home. She is a good dog.

Bob and Sandy are celebrating their 18Th Wedding Anniversary. It's just amazing! They were both married about 50 years before their spouse died. Then they found each other again and love each other dearly. It's kind of funny their second marriage has lasted longer than my first marriage. So I wonder what is the secret to a lasting marriage. From watching them too.. I would say it's the following.

1. You have to kiss a lot
2. Allow your wife to eat chocolate. even though you don't think she needs it.
3. Take her to dinner
4. get a buzz with her in the evenings
5. When you guys get old.. don't pay any attention to our depends.. they are panties. We won't laugh at you when you poop your pants. Deal?
   
6. My last suggestion is kind of the number one rule. Men listen up.. When your wife tells you to shut up!! You better do it!!!!
   

More work stories

It's part of the agreement with my company and my clients that caregivers sleep at night. We sleep listening to a baby moniter. Last night there was a lot of static and I turned it down some. So I guess Sandy got up and was walking around and I didn't hear her. So Bob wakes me up and I wait for Sandy to get done in the bathroom and help her back to bed. I felt bad, because I didn't hear her.
My question to my readers is it okay to suggest bells for her walker? Would that be degrading... like making her a cat? meowwwwwww

my thoughts for the day

I don't have too much good to say these days. The only thing that seems to be going totally right is my crazy animals. This is a picture of my lab, Ann, when she was much younger. Not that she is really old. She is about a year and half.
We have the most perfect set up for her. She has a pretty big backyard to run in, and has a dog run, and a dog house built into the garage. She is spoiled, we never lock her up in the run, but she does sleep in her crate at night, we call it a condo.

We also have other animals. We have four cats, who love watching my son's new bird feeder. My baby cat loves to play with the bunny. How many people can show you pictures of a cat in a rabbit's cage?

The not so good stuff going on is my life is a mixture of feeling a terrible loss right now over my daughter. I feel strongly that there is this bond between us, and it can't be broken. I get the feeling that my daughter would want me in her life, not as her Mom, but maybe as a friend, but her parents are holding her back. I have no proof of that, it's just a feeling I get.

I am a little upset over my job. I got a review and they marked me off for not being very flexible, and because at times, I want a day off, or a few hours off, and don't want to make up the hours, they are talking about finding someone new for my clients. So basically one week, I would work my normal 24 hour/3 days a week, and the next just 2 24/hr twice a week, and maybe pick up a few hours else where. I think they are worried about my stress level. I think what got them really going on finding someone else was the talk of me wanting a vacation in spring. So now my question to myself is do I still take the time off?

Well I got to go get ready for work. Bye all.

a day in my life as a caregiver

I get to work for my 24 hour shift and my co worker told me that Sandy had a rough morning. She was really confused. She claimed there was deaf mutes in the house, and we need to call the police. When she is that way it's really hard to get her to calm down. What it is that when she dreams, she has a hard time separating reality from her dreams.
So about 9:30 am, I go into the bedroom, because I hear her making noise.
Me: Good Morning
Sandy: Good Morning Pal, Did you hear about the deaf mutes?
Me: Yea that's weird
So i help her potty and she goes back to bed.. later she gets up again.
Me: Do you need some help?
Sandy: What is the situation on our deaf mutes?
Me:I told them to go home and they are gone now
Sandy: good

A little bit later, I hear her stirring and I go stand by the commode as she is trying to sit down. I hold my arms out to be close, but let her do it on her own if she could. Right when i got there, she fell in my arms.
Sandy: What good timing.. what would I do without you?
Me: I am speechless... I just love Sandy so much. The real question is what I am going to do without her... She will be 98 years old next month.
Fast forward to this early am.. it's 4 am and I hear her. So i get up and help her use the commode. I am trying to stable her and pull up her depends.. She keeps making these movements like she is about to fall. She gives me a dirty look.
Sandy: Will you leave me alone..
Me: I remove my hands from her, but keep them close
Sandy: I don't mean that way
Me: I don't understand what you need from me
Sandy: I am trying to make a golf swing.. don't I have to make a shot?
Me: Not a 4 am
Sandy: OK and she lets me help her to bed.
Now this isn't my whole day... That was the exiting parts lol

There isn't too much new going on here. I finally got my review from my job. They gave me a good review except, I am not very flexible in changing my hours around, and I didn't do my online training. I knew I was blowing off the training.. I did it because if they don't play by the rules then I wasn't going to either. However it's all good, because I am now going to make another 3 a day, and when they did the math.. the back pay was........ over 300 dollars.
I seen my old English teacher in his office so I stopped to say hi. He is so cute. I keep teasing my husband about the young college boys, but this girl don't play with boys. mmmmm teachers maybe. lol I am just kidding. I am committed to my husband.

I have a question for dog owners... Do you ever find yourself really wanting to carry a conversation with your dog? I mean for example... It's cold outside... really cold out. I was going to go to work, and it would be about four or five hours before anyone would come home. I not only want to talk to my dog, but I wish she could answer me. So it would go like this..

Me.. Ann it's very cold out

Ann... Duh you noticed.. where you been? we live in Illinois.

Me... You have two choices.. Do you want to spend time outside.. you got your dog house.. or inside in the condo. Outside you can run, pee, poop,but you might be cold. Inside you are confined to what we call a condo.. and you can't run, pee or poop.. No one will be home for a few hours.. So what is the answer?

Ann.... Just feed me lady

Me... Come on give me a answer.. inside or outside?

Ann... Just go to work.. and don't forget to bring me home a steak..

Me.... Alright Ann your going in the condo.. it's too cold.

Ann.... Stupid bitch thinks I am going to talk.. didn't she notice. Helloooo I am a dog. Damn now I am stuck in this doggy jail. she better bring home some bacon.

back to college

Today was the start of college life again. I am only taking one class right now and that is English 101. I am officially going to learn at the college level. So you might ask why doesn't my blog show college work. It's because my blog is for fun, so that's why.

College this time around seems the same in some ways, but different. Two days of the week, I am in the same room, and I choose the same seat. The teacher isn't young and hot. :( He did make a good impression on me though. He seems like he might be able to be cool. Hey just because I am in my 30's and married to a old man doesn't mean I don't like to have some fun once in a while. Tad... Saturday westerns don't count... that reminds me of my Dad. haha. None of the students in my class were in my English 99 class. It would have been nice to at least see one or two familiar faces, but I did run into two guys in the hallway. These two guys were fresh out of high school last fall, and they took the time to get my attention to say hello. Watch out Tad the young guys still notice me!!!!
There was tons and tons of cars there, and it was freezing. I had to walk from quite a distance. As the semester gets started some will drop and parking will get better.
I waited till the last minute to get registered, so why change now. I went to class without books. Going on the first day with books would be so uncool. I am not going to be not only old, but caught with books on the first day. I did go get the books right after class. It was cool, because I knew where to go and how to get them. I rule the school. I love the environment of college, to see the excitement in the young ones face. Too bad they are in for a rude awakening life is rough!! The real world sucks sometimes, in my last 24 hour shift, both my clients fell, and both pee'd the bed. ewww. I had to get her all cleaned up, and made her lie on the couch, he cleans himself up and goes back in the bed. Maybe he only pissed on himself and not the bed, but you can't tell him. Oh and my job suddenly noticed that I have never had a annual review so Wednesday I go in for a review. Maybe I will get a raise enough to buy some dye to cover my grey hair. hahahahaha. Did I mention he gave homework already?
Now for some pictures. I am not as good as Jennifer with typing and putting the pictures in the right spot. But who cares? Not me. I am me and if you don't like... then don't let the door hit you. :)

Happy Birthday Michelle... I love you!!!

Hope you have a good day little sister!!!

babysitting

We are babysitting my sister's dog. It's hard to tell them apart in the video, but one is Ann and the other is Princess. Check out the pretty girls. The slightly bigger one is Ann.

ymca

Tonight Tyler and I went to the Ymca for swiming. We had a good time. There wasn't hardly anyone swimming which isn't either bad or good. The lifegaurd, a young guy, was only watching after three people. So he started to throw a ball at Tyler, and he would throw it back at him. This went on for about 20 minutes or so. It was kind of nice, because Tyler was interacting with someone other than his parents. Also if gave me some space. Tyler tends to hang on me, and I mean really hang on me. He doesn't do it of of fear, but for fun. I am his motor boat lol. As the lifegaurd is playing, he is also talking to the other guy in the pool. It's a intructor for the swimming lessons at the Y. He was telling him how he could get in trouble for playing with Tyler, that they want him to sit and not talk to anyone. I was planning on telling the Ymca what a good job he did by playing with Tyler. Then I hear he is breaking the rules. I can understand with a pool full of people that he should be more focused on watching people swim, but there was only three of us. He was playing with the person at the biggest risk. What happened to people being able to use their judgement? Why can't he use his judgement and decide when it's safe to go beyond of just watching the swimmers. Why can't he talk or play with a child or two if he feels it's safe. It because some big idiot decides they want to make rules and you people who are below will listen to me or what. People aren't being allowed to use their own judgement, and the people making all the rules wonder why everyone loses their brain. If you don't use it, you lose it. So what this big shots are doing is making a bunch of dummies. It's simliar to in my job, that is taking care of the elderly, I am not allowed to put on a simple band-aid, or apply a medicated cream. If a client has a headache, I can't decide they need tylenol. I have to twiddle my thumbs and say I am not allowed to do that. I can't think for myself. Why when you go to a restaurant are they told to say a specific thing instead of allowing the waitress to have a personality. I think if these hot shots want robots, then they should hire robots.
I haven't been to the Ymca for my hot tub in over a week. I have been trying to workout on my equipment in the basement. I managed to have a take of gas last me almost two weeks. My last fill-up before today was Monday before New years. So I am long overdue for a soaking in the hot tub. Sorry if your jealous!!! hahahahaha don't ya love me.

Tonight Tyler and I went to chucky cheese. It was a Christmas present. If I see people begging for pictures, I will post some. We had a great time. At first I felt bad, because it was just the two of us, but sometimes I need one on one time with my boy. I don't feel there is nothing wrong with that, but I still have guilt. I think he is growing up too fast, and I don't like it!!!

Today is my Dad's birthday!! Happy birthday Dad!! Tyler and I had a night of fun for you!! Love you!! Where is our pie??

We all have been taking turns being sick. It came on quick with upset stomach, then throwing up, and going from being hot to cold in a matter of minutes, and don't forget the headache. Saturday I pretty much ignored my kids all day, and had to call in for my Sunday shift. It was the first day that I have missed since I started working the 24 hour shifts. I could have made it, but I didn't want to take the chance with my clients.
So on Sunday morning, Will always goes to church with his Dad and then home. He decides since I am staying home that he could stay home, and we could play sorry. Hello I am sick from work... not playing lying just for a day off. Did I mention the painful legs and back? So Will went with his Dad to church and I stayed home. It wasn't until much later that I was feeling almost back to normal. So I played a game of Sorry with Tyler, and the next day we played a game of trouble. He won both games.
I am bummed out because I got a problem. Tyler is growing up. He is a cute, sweet, adorable kid right now. He thinks of others, and wants to please his Mommy. He isn't afraid to kiss him Mommy around other people, but someday he will grow up. There is just something about the innocence of a young child that you can't pay for. They still believe in the Easter Bunny, Santa, and the tooth fairy. The day will come when he will tell me that he understands that the Tooth fairy has to wait to payday, and the magic is gone. The excitement in the child's voice and sparkle in their eyes are gone. Then the Mommy's are screaming inside, because they want their baby back. Someone took their baby and gave them this kid, who is still cute, but not as eager to please and their isn't anymore magic. I don't know if this made any sense or not, but oh well.

Tyler was long overdue for a hair cut. Here is his before and after pictures.

I am kind of after a little advice here. As most people know Will and Tyler live apart now. They see each every weekend, and then some here and there. 9 out of 10 times if he sees Will more it's because I make the effort to see Will. Will wishes were to live with Bill. So here is where I want advice. For both kids, I gave them a gift card. Will got one for the movies. (Bill and him went while Tyler was home with me) That was okay with me, I didn't give the gift card to demand how he used it. Tyler received a evening out at Chucky Cheese for some pizza, games and fun. Now do I go get Will? I am sure Tyler will have fun either way. I want to go during the week, so it won't be so busy. So if I wait till Will is home from school, it will be kind of a late night on a school night. I feel guilty when I don't run and include Will in the stuff we do, but I feel like he made his choice, and if Bill isn't running to get Tyler then it's not in Tyler's best interest to run for Will. I know that doesn't sound right, because that is punishing Will, because of Bill's actions, or lack of actions. But is it really a punishment? He made it very clear that he wanted to live with his Dad. I consider it more of a lesson... you can't have your cake and eat it too.
I am not mad at Will because he chose his Dad's place over ours. We can't compete with the lack of rules, and allowing video games and staying up all hours of the night. Also Will knows if he lives with his Dad, I will still call and make a effort to see him, where his Dad only existed as a every other weekend Dad. You can't be a parent every other weekend. So I believe Will chose Dad's house overall, because otherwise his Dad was not gonna be in life his life. No phone calls, very little adventures outside of the weekend, and so William chose the household with the least amount of rules. Sounds like a good life for a teenager, but when he is older he will see the difference. So I believe he chose the worst of two different lifestyles. . Divorce sucks!! Not because I am apart from someone I once loved, and we know each other better than most people, but the children are the innocent ones.

It's another year!!! Happy new year and all that bull shit!!! Another day older and deeper in debt!! I am so excited. My darn furnace isn't working right, but at least I have a home warranty, and it should only cost me 55.00, unless there is little fine print about what is wrong with ours.